Random Acts of Nihilism

Dear Evangelicals:

In 1993, Conari Press published a little book called Random Acts of Kindness. The book ignited a movement and, not incidentally in America, an international industry. There are sequels by the score, websites, blogs, and social media accounts. There's even a National Random Acts of Kindness Day next month.

Never mind that people used to do these things for each other without a self-congratulatory social "movement" to prod them along; a world that was already vicious and self-serving has only gotten meaner since the birth of the RAK movement. And you helped. In direct contradiction of Jesus's teachings, you helped.

Not only that, but you're proud of it, because, hey, we're all gonna be raptured before the Great Tribulation, so you might as well paste yourself into your easy chair for family time, because all those grievous sinners who haven't been blessed with families are out there helping. You have better things to do.

Yeah, husband of one wife? Price above rubies woman? That's not what the Bible says.

No, the Bible orders you to take up your cross daily. To die daily. To do good, correct oppression, seek justice for orphans and widows.

Oh, but you, you, you. You always have an excuse. If you don't get your me-time, someone (Read: widows, orphans, the poor, and the oppressed) is gonna pay.

On alternate days, you grant yourselves a luxurious, emotional spa day, marinating in guilt, and telling yourself that your oppressed acquaintances bear so much ill will toward you, for refusing to help up to now, that they'd never accept help -- even if you did offer it.

Which you won't because, as you've already discovered with these weaklings, suffering is a marathon, not a sprint; and a glorious lambkin of God like yourself ain't got time for no grubby, anonymous marathon. You'd rather pay for the half-caf soy latte that the guy behind you -- who looks just like you, and not the icky poor -- is sure to order.

Voila! A random act of kindness! Aren't you the godly one?

No.

See, God says you extend kindness to those who can't afford to pay you back. No, He says you invite them, so you're looking them in the face, in all their poverty and hardship and suffering and shabbiness. In all their un-awesomeness.

But, muh glory!

As Jesus said of those who spend their lives slobbering after the approval of others, "They have their reward."

But wait; there's more! Of course there is, because God always has more for people like you.

Are you ready? Here we go.

At the end of time, when everyone is being judged by Jesus, He will look at the awesome life you had because you're so in love with Him, and He will say something to you that everyone who's ever been born will hear.

How's that for glory?